Thursday, July 31, 2014

July to August: Feeling Kinda Funky

Erin and I are using
Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain
and one of the first exercises
is to draw a self portrait.
Yes, I am still on bed rest.  But in the midst of the bed rest, I do get to use the bike for 30 minutes.  The physical therapist has me doing a few other exercises to strengthen the muscles in my leg.  She even had to use electrical stimulation, I had lost so much strength.  And flexibility.  All because I’ve been protecting my knee.  What she has me doing is painful.  There’s no question about it.  Very painful. 

And this is how I ended the month.  I started July in pain, and the doctor gave me a prescription for the inflammation that made me sick.  He switched me over from Naproxen Sodium (550mg 2x/day), which literally had me bleeding, to Meloxicam (7.5mg 1x/day).  I am recording this here for future reference so I’ll know what I can or cannot stomach because, if another doctor someday try to prescribe something to me,

So this past month has been mostly about my being on bed rest, trying not to feel discouraged or depressed.  I even had a job interview.  I used a cane to help me walk and I did my best but I didn’t get the job.  Yeah.  Really trying not to feel depressed.

There’s no point looking back.  Instead, I am looking ahead, to August.  And it’s going to be quite a busy month.

We have two birthdays.  Matt and my daughter both have birthdays.  For Matt, I’ll be baking a carrot cake with Erin who wants to learn how to make things and it made sense to start with something delicious like a carrot cake.  Shira hasn’t decided what she wants yet, although she thinks she wants something with some sort of apricot in it.  That’s helpful.  I’m sending her recipes I’ve found online and more than a few look quite delicious but she hasn’t chosen one over any of the others.  She will.  Eventually.  Hopefully early enough for me to be able to gather all of the ingredients and bake it. 

The second exercise
has us drawing our hand so
I drew mine resting on a pillow
The plans for our trip have begun to solidify but I’ve been unable to really think about it because I’m still trying to feel better.  I want to be able to walk around London cane-free.  But being stuck in bed hasn’t exactly inspired me to find things to do when we get there.  After all, if I’m using the cane still, such things as strolling through a large park may not be as inviting as they would be if I were cane free.  I’m really hoping to be cane free.

Aside from celebrating birthdays and hoping to heal, we are expecting another visit from Marc although it won’t be a good one because he’ll be in town for Dragoncon which means he’ll mostly be grabbing some food and sleep before dashing off to the fun.  Still, I’ll get to hug him and feed him and enjoy some random and brief moments, which is better than not seeing him for months and months and more months on end.

So maybe July wasn’t the best for me emotionally—walking out of a job, being turned down for another, spending all of the month in pain.  But one month doesn’t define my year, let alone my life, or even me.  It’s just not been the best and sometimes that’s okay. 

And maybe, if my knee gets better, I'll finally get around to getting my haircut which is where my July was supposed to begin.  :P